{"id":60772,"date":"2020-05-26T10:00:27","date_gmt":"2020-05-26T14:00:27","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/?p=60772"},"modified":"2026-02-18T10:38:12","modified_gmt":"2026-02-18T15:38:12","slug":"guilt","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/guilt\/","title":{"rendered":"The enemy of homeschooling: Guilt"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/guilt\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-60778 size-full\" src=\"http:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/guilt-horizontal.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"575\" height=\"383\" srcset=\"https:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/guilt-horizontal.jpg 575w, https:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/guilt-horizontal-300x200.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 575px) 100vw, 575px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><em><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Written by <a href=\"https:\/\/www.karasanderson.com\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Kara S. Anderson<\/a><\/span><\/em><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span class=\"\u201cdrop_cap&quot;\">A<\/span> few weeks ago, I made a commitment that we were going to finish the last six weeks of school STRONG.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">We were going to buckle down on math, and finish the things that were lingering out there.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I was so serious, that I put it on <a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/p\/Bw4u-cRBe0x\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Instagram<\/a>. I wanted some accountability. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Pretty much as soon as I did this, my daughter ended up in the hospital for three days. This was after a trip to the emergency room, returning home, and then heading back.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">She got home on my husband\u2019s birthday, which we barely celebrated. We still owe him a cake.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Two minutes later it was Mother\u2019s Day, and then came a dead car, a broken toilet, and finally, a window that just exploded.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-60773 aligncenter\" src=\"http:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/SH-collage.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"575\" height=\"288\" srcset=\"https:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/SH-collage.jpg 575w, https:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/SH-collage-300x150.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 575px) 100vw, 575px\" \/><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So as I sit here typing this, my question is obviously, <\/span><b>\u201cIf God really wanted me to buckle down on homeschooling, why does He keep giving me all this other stuff to do?\u201d<\/b><\/p>\n<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">This is not a new idea, of course. My favorite resource when I need to remember that God never intended us to shove 36 hours of homeschooling, parenting, housekeeping, work, etc., into a 24-hour day is Sarah Mackenzie\u2019s <em><a href=\"https:\/\/amzn.to\/2KdgdRo\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Teaching From Rest<\/a><\/em>. (afflink)<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-60774 aligncenter\" src=\"http:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/guilt-2.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"575\" height=\"431\" srcset=\"https:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/guilt-2.jpg 575w, https:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/guilt-2-300x225.jpg 300w, https:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/guilt-2-550x413.jpg 550w, https:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/guilt-2-350x263.jpg 350w, https:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/guilt-2-260x195.jpg 260w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 575px) 100vw, 575px\" \/><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In it, she writes:<\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201cTake a hard look at the 168 hours in your week. Now consider your non-negotiables: sleep, eat, shower, pray. Plug in meal preparation, rest and church on Sunday, and enough wind-down time at the end of each day to ensure a good night\u2019s sleep. See what\u2019s left? You don\u2019t get any more than that, sister.\u201d<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Crap.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Although I know that\u2019s true, I kind of hate it.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Because I always feel behind on something. <\/span><b>And sometimes the things that fall off the to-do list are the BIG things.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Tuesday, my day started with pre-caffeine pajama toilet plunging. Guess what happened to Bible Study? <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Wednesday my son\u2019s window shattered before I had even gotten out of bed. So math was delayed by careful glass clean-up and multiple phone calls.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I can\u2019t beat myself up about this. The window needs to get fixed; we need a car because not having one is keeping us from being able to fulfill commitments and get where we need to go, like \u2026 work.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>So I don\u2019t think my problem is priorities.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I don\u2019t suspect yours is either, although I know a lot of you are in the same place as I am &#8211; always feeling behind &#8211; dealing with disappointment as another school year wraps up and you didn\u2019t fit it all you wanted to.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It\u2019s a terrible feeling &#8211; and the countdown clock has only gotten louder for me as my kids age and I\u2019ve started to focus on the number of years before they leave home.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It\u2019s all enough to paralyze me if I let it, and yet, <\/span><b><i>I know I am trying.<\/i><\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> I know my heart is in the right place for these kids. I want to give them everything, it\u2019s just that life keeps getting in the way.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\" wp-image-60779 aligncenter\" src=\"http:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/guilt-vertical-pico.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"447\" height=\"639\" srcset=\"https:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/guilt-vertical-pico.jpg 500w, https:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/guilt-vertical-pico-210x300.jpg 210w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 447px) 100vw, 447px\" \/><\/p>\n<h3><strong>Rhythm lost<\/strong><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Earlier this year we moved. It shifted everything. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I just realized this past week that I have yet to bake cookies in this house, and we\u2019ve been here six months.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Is it any wonder, then, that school hasn\u2019t yet found its rhythm?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And the harder I push, the harder I get push-back &#8211; not from my kids, necessarily, but from LIFE. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There is simply always something beeping, breaking, brewing or barfing (&lt;&#8212; usually pets.)<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">We can\u2019t ignore those things. What kind of parents are we if we teach our kids division, but neglect to buy groceries? Or if we drill them on capitals, but never take them to the dentist?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Any homeschool parent who has been at this for more than 15 minutes knows that <\/span><b>home education is different. We\u2019ve all heard that unlike school, homeschooling is a way of life.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But the standards and old rules are still deeply ingrained. Learning still looks like a kid with a pencil, even if that kid is perched in a tree.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><strong>Press pause<\/strong><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When I\u2019m able to press pause, I remember that learning can look all kinds of ways, and can happen anywhere. I remember to look at my kids and see that they are healthy, happy, engaged, smart, funny \u2026<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-60775 aligncenter\" src=\"http:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/guilt3.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"575\" height=\"526\" srcset=\"https:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/guilt3.jpg 575w, https:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/guilt3-300x274.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 575px) 100vw, 575px\" \/><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But then I also remember I need to make a radiology appointment.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><strong>I feel a little frazzled most of the time lately, and I can point to the exact origin &#8211; GUILT.<\/strong> Guilt weighs on me so much that every few months I have to go to get my neck fixed. The diagnosis: \u201cstress.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It doesn\u2019t help that in 2019, we have people bashing working homeschooling parents. What I see from the working homeschool parents I know is so much effort to get it right, to find a balance \u2026 to keep their kids first &#8230;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Slinging mud then is just a toxic smokescreen and P.S. I don\u2019t often see dads criticized for working. Ahem.<\/span><\/p>\n<h3><strong>Intention and effort<\/strong><\/h3>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And so this is where I find myself, on a Wednesday, when I am writing a post instead of baking cookies; instead of teaching my kids Latin, instead of calling the radiologist:<\/span><\/p>\n<p><strong>I am doing the best I can.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I wish it was better and more, but I am working on that &#8211; <em>not the better and more part, but the guilt part.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Because now I get to log off, and I get to be with my kids. And dragging residual guilt into our time together isn\u2019t going to help anyone.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I bet you are doing your best too. Not THE BEST. (That\u2019s fancy internet nonsense curated by people with more free time and less puking pets and exploding windows than you and me).<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>We are real parents, giving real effort, 24 hours a day.<\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I want to believe that intention and effort is enough here. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I\u2019m sure that LOVE is. But as homeschooling parents, we need to show ourselves love too.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><strong>We know this is still a path less chosen.<\/strong> There will be plenty of people who will tell us that what we are endeavoring to do is too hard; that we aren\u2019t capable; or that we aren\u2019t doing it right.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When we add our own voice &#8211; the voice of guilt &#8211; on top of that, we\u2019re dooming ourselves to failure, or at least to missing out on the beauty in the mess.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I wish I could tell us all that <\/span><b>we are enough<\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, and that when we look back, we\u2019ll wish we spent all these hours worrying just enjoying our kids.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The very reason this is so hard in the moment is because we desperately want to get it right.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><em><strong>But then, doesn\u2019t that prove that there is no one out there more perfect for the job?<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n<p class=\"alert\"><i>How do you deal with homeschool guilt? Where are you finding beauty in the busyness of life?<\/i><\/p>\n<p>Originally posted on May 29, 2019<\/p>\n<p><em><strong><a href=\"https:\/\/simplehomeschool.net\/quiz\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">What&#8217;s Your Homeschool Mom Personality? Take Jamie&#8217;s quiz now<\/a><\/strong>\u00a0and receive a free personality report to help you organize your homeschool based on what your personality type needs most!<\/em><\/p>\n<div style=\"margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px;\" class=\"sharethis-inline-share-buttons\" ><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Written by Kara S. Anderson A few weeks ago, I made a commitment that we were going to finish the last six weeks of school STRONG. We were going to buckle down on math, and finish the things that were lingering out there. I was so serious, that I put it on Instagram. I wanted&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":25,"featured_media":60778,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[344,343],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-60772","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-homeschool-sos","category-homeschool-sos-inspiration"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>The enemy of homeschooling: Guilt - Simple Homeschool<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"It\u2019s all enough to paralyze me if I let it, and yet, I know I am trying. 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